Help For The Grieving
If you have just lost a love one, nothing is going to take away the pain and sorrow immediately. There is no “quick fix”. And you have probably already heard all the standard fare about how they are “in a better place now”, “it was meant to be”, “only God knows the big plan”, “God needed another angel”, etc., etc. You probably don’t want to hear these things even if they are true. Pain, suffering, and anger are very normal part of the grieving process. Don’t even try to deny yourself of these feelings. It’s supposed to hurt. Healing takes time. How you cope with these feelings is what is important.
There are many ways of coping with the death of a loved one. For example some people get drunk. But that’s not a very constructive method of dealing with any problem. One of the best ways of getting past your own pain is to help others. Someone once said, ” I felt sorry for myself because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet”. There is always someone worse off than you. Think about joining a volunteer group or charity organization.
Just search all the different sources on the Internet for ways to find help coping with your loss. There is a support group for just about every situation imaginable.
For me, nothing replaces reading the Bible to find comfort. Not only for my grief for my loved ones who have passed away, but also when I contemplate my own mortality. I am not afraid of my own impending death when I think of being risen again to be with Jesus in heaven.
It helps me to know that if God raised His Son from the dead (and I believe that He did), He can do the same for my loved ones and for me. No one on Earth has suffered any more than Jesus did during His short time here. And for the Father to have to watch His Son suffer and die…well I can’t imagine anything more painful than that. Especially when He could have easily said, “To hell with those ungrateful people on Earth” But He loved us so much that He gave His Son to suffer and die a most horrible death so He could crush the Devil and win back our place for us in Heaven with Him (the Devil tricked us in the Garden of Eden).
I realize that not everyone would like to have a picture of their dearly departed loved one…with or without Jesus…especially if it has been too soon and the death has been too painful. In fact, it is a very normal reaction to be angry with God for a long time after a loved one has passed away.
Even my own sister has a problem with my pictures in that she doesn’t believe that we should depict Jesus in pictures because we don’t really know what He looked like. That’s fine for her, but as for me, I found that looking at pictures of my Dad with Jesus was very comforting and I have several drawers full of thank you letters and cards from customers who agree with me. They have found that being able to visualize their loved one with Jesus is a great aid in healing from their grief. In fact, I am proud to say, in some cases, our “Jesus and Loved One” pictures have been instrumental in the healing process.
The worst picture I have done to date (quality-wise) was from a newspaper clipping of an obituary. It was the only picture that she had of her father. I worked on it for 2 weeks and finally sent her all my best efforts but I wasn’t satisfied with the quality of any of them. She called me a few days later…and thanked me…between sobs …for the beautiful picture of her Dad with Jesus. Beauty truly is in the eyes of the beholder.
My favorite testimony for our pictures came from within our own family. Jenny and I gave all of her brothers and her sister a picture of their Dad with Jesus for a Christmas present. That night, Jenny’s sister was tucking in her 6 year old daughter and was asked to get the picture of “Grandpa with Jesus” . She got the picture for her daughter who looked at it and began to weep. Soon her mother was weeping right along with her. Jenny’s sister told us later that it was the first time that her daughter had cried for her Grandfather since he died 10 month’s before.
Crying is a very important part of “getting better” .
Bible Verses to Comfort
We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.
1 Thessalonians 4:14
But you, O God, do see trouble and grief; you consider it to take it in hand.
“Surely the LORD is in the place, and I was not aware of it.”
My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life.
It is only a matter of time before it is our “time to mourn.”
The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
For you saw my affliction and knew the anguish of my soul.
“You do not want to leave too, do you?” Jesus asked the Twelve. Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.”
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.